BottleOfBlog

Yer Librul Media, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah...

In December of 2006, the brightest minds at CNN pundificated:

“The senator was in New Hampshire over the weekend, sporting what’s getting to be the classic Obama look. Call it business casual, a jacket, a collared shirt, but no tie.

    “It is a look the senator seems to favor. And why not? It is dressy enough to suggest seriousness of purpose, but without the stuffiness of a tie, much less a suit. There is a comfort level here that reflects one of Obama’s strongest political assets, a sense that he is comfortable in his own skin, that he knows who he is.

    “But, in the case of Obama, he may be walking around with a sartorial time bomb. Ask yourself, is there any other major public figure who dresses the way he does? Why, yes. It is Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, who, unlike most of his predecessors, seems to have skipped through enough copies of “GQ” to find the jacket-and-no-tie look agreeable.

    “And maybe that’s not the comparison a possible presidential contender really wants to evoke…. [I]t’s one thing to have a last name that sounds like Osama and a middle name, Hussein, that is probably less than helpful. But an outfit that reminds people of a charter member of the axis of evil, why, this could leave his presidential hopes hanging by a thread. Or is that threads?”

Jacket, collared shirt, no tie?  A sartorial time bomb!  Barrack Hussein Obama--which rhymes with Osama--is dressing today like he called Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad last night and said, "What are you wearing tomorrow?  And, also, if you're interested, I know how to build an intercontinental ballistic missile capable of carrying nuclear warheads.  It's stuff I learned at my madrassa."

But seriously, ask yourself, like the liberal Clinton News Network, "is there any other major public figure"--aside from the President of Iran--"who dresses the way [Barrack Obama] does"?

Any?

At all?

Can anyone think of just one fucking terrorist--sorry--Democrat or even mainstream(like, for instance, Mitt Romney, or Rudy Guiliani, or Fred Thompson, or Newt Gingrich)  politician who dresses in such a tieless, jacketed, collared shirted sartorial time bombish, fascist, terroristic, Jew hating, makes me think of Saddam Hussein kind of way?

Anyone?

The liberal bias of the media is overwhelming.

The American People Don't Know That They Don't Want To Know What They Want To Know

But where’s the coverage? Glenn Greenwald at Salon calls attention to a remarkable segment from The Chris Matthews Show featuring Norah O’Donnell, MSNBC’s chief Washington correspondent; Richard Stengel, editor of Time magazine; Gloria Borger, CBS News’ national political correspondent; and Patrick Healy, a New York Times reporter—practically a who’s who of what’s what in the mainstream media. Here’s what the poohbahs said:

Stengel: “I am so uninterested in the Democrats wanting Karl Rove, because it is so bad for them. Because it shows business as usual, tit for tat, vengeance.” He goes on to say that such oversight is not “what voters want to see,” and is mere “small bore politics.”

David Broder, Dean of Conventional Wisdom, concurs, writing in The Washington Post, “It seems doubtful that Democrats can help themselves a great deal just by tearing down an already discredited Republican administration with more investigations such as the current attack on the Justice Department and White House over the firings of eight U.S. attorneys. ... At some point, Democrats have to give people something to vote for.”

Since when are our high-minded pundits supposed to put their strategic calculations of political advantage ahead of right and wrong and the manipulation both the law and law enforcement itself? And moreover...Oh really? According to The Gallup Organization, 72 percent of Americans want Congress to investigate the White House’s involvement in the prosecutor scandal. Sixty-eight percent think that Congress should issue subpoenas to force testimony from administration officials. And recall, if you will, that during the 2006 elections, a CNN-sponsored exit poll discovered that more voters are concerned about corruption and ethics issues than the war in Iraq.

Yet the prevailing MSM attitude is “Let them get away with it.”

It's kind of remarkable, isn't it?  The greatest scandals of my lifetime(having not lived through Kennedy's super weird assassination or the Gulf of Tonkin)--thousands of lawful voters get unlawfully purged from the rolls in a state which is governed by the brother of one of the candidates and which decides an entire presidential election by a few hundred votes;  a terrorist attack that kills thousands of Americans catches the Bush administration by surprise despite warnings from the CIA and the burning hair of the highest ranking anti-terrorist officials in the country;  the Vice President apparently running the country during the attack while the President flees to a NORAD shelter;  the murderer of thousands of Americans is let go;  Zarqawi is given a pass;  a case for war is entirely made up;  at tax payer expense, an aircraft carrier is halted in the Pacific so the President can film a campaign commercial under a great big banner reading "Mission Accomplished" even though the mission is not accomplished and the banner is later blamed on the navy; First Amendment "zones" are established within the United States; Congressmen get bribed and blackmailed on the floor of the House;  covert CIA agents get publicly exposed;  during an election year, terror alerts seem to occur at extremely convenient times and then cease altogether after the election;  Americans torture and kill people in their custody;  Americans try to throw out the Great Writ Of Habeus Corpus;  Americans operate secret prisons in undisclosed locations, while in known locations people are held for years without charge, legal representation, or access to courts;  the government eavesdrops on thousands of Americans without warrants;  the head of MI6 admits that the Bush administration planned on faking a cause for war, and on and on...

And, now?  Eight United States attorneys in a half dozen swing states in the 2008 elections get fired for being unwilling to haul innocent Democrats in front of grand juries in a timely fashion.

And, aside from Karl Rove and George W. Bush, what's the only other constant to this non-stop parade of corruption and criminality?

Your Bush hating, "liberal" media has told you at every step of the way that there's nothing to see here, there's nothing new here, there's no real scandal, this is all old news, and calling for investigations or--heaven forbid--actually investigating are mere partisan, political grandstanding.

And the American people don't want any of that.

But they do.

After six years of the most appalling, lawless government ever, the American People do want the Congress to invesitgate our own government.

And mostly because our "liberal" media won't.

But that's weird, don't you think?  With so much to investigate, with so many great stories of corruption and lying and criminality, the only story the biggest names in your Washington press corps want to tell is that the American People would really rather not hear any of this.

It's disturbing, really.

Gee Oh Pee Limbo

WASHINGTON - President Bush accused the Democratic-led Congress of wasting taxpayers’ time picking fights with the White House instead of resolving disputes over money for U.S. troops and the firings of the U.S. attorneys…

“Members of Congress now face a choice: whether they will waste time and provoke an unnecessary confrontation, or whether they will join us in working to do the people’s business,” Bush said. “We have many important issues before us. So we need to put partisan politics aside and come together to enact important legislation for the American people.”

Oh, no!  Not those ol' partisans from the Democrat party again!  How could they?  How could they waste time on partisan politics when the People's Bidness requires important legislation for important issues?

Georgie, where were you nine months ago?

When, with two ongoing, unwon wars, a skyrocketing national deficit threatening our future, a Federal gubment in chaos and disorder, New Orleans--again!--unreconstructed, Osama bin Laden still on the loose, the Republican majority leader of the House under indictment, one of the highest ranking Republicans on both the Appropriations and Intelligence committees was in a Federal prison, when the third ranking official at the newly reformed CIA was under investigation for fraud, bribery, and generally rolling around in lobbyist supplied hookers, what important legislation about important issues was the Republican Congress trying to pass for the benefit of the People's bidness?

Taxing pimps and whores!

NEW YORK (CNN) -- Republican Sen. Charles Grassley of Iowa is hoping to stamp out the sex trade by taxing pimps and prostitutes, then jailing them when they don't pay.

The Senate Judiciary Committee Wednesday morning approved a bill sponsored by committee chairman Sen. Charles Grassley, R-Iowa, authorizing at least $2 million toward the establishment of an office in the IRS criminal investigation unit to prosecute unlawful sex workers for violations of tax laws.

A Constitutional Amendment prohibiting something that never, ever, ever, ever happens!

WASHINGTON (CNN) -- The Senate began debate Monday on a proposed constitutional amendment that would prohibit the desecration of the American flag, the latest in a series of election-year votes pushed by the chamber's Republican leaders.

Gay marriages!

WASHINGTON (CNN) -- The Senate is scheduled to vote Wednesday morning on a controversial constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriage, but even supporters concede the measure does not have enough votes to win approval.

Making  English the "national language" in a country where English is and has been spoken by 99% of the People for the last four hundred years!

(CNSNews.com) - An amendment to the Senate immigration bill would make English the "national language of the United States." The Senate voted 63-34 to adopt the amendment, which was offered by Sen. James Inhofe (R-Okla.).

 A pay raise for...Congress!

WASHINGTON - Despite record low approval ratings, House lawmakers Tuesday embraced a $3,300 pay raise that will increase their salaries to $168,500.

And, yes, finally, trying to pass a law to keep the words "under God" in the entirely silly, kind of Orwellian creepy, entirely made up out of thin air Pledge of Allegiance:

WASHINGTON —  The House, citing the nation's religious origins, voted Wednesday to protect the Pledge of Allegiance from federal judges who might try to stop schoolchildren and others from reciting it because of the phrase "under God."

Because, you know, it's important to God--who's running this whole infinite universe, who's birthing stars of unimaginable power beyond the far ends of your imagination, who created life, who started time, and who's known the End of Everything before there was Anything--that stupid drowsy eight year olds, who still have sleep crud in their eyes say "under God" before they get down to the important business of picking their noses and wondering if it's mock pizzas or tater tots for lunch.

That means a lot to God.

That's the kind of bipartisan crap your Congress was doing all last year.  And your President was not in the least bit concerned about it.  He didn't say shit about it.  Though, again, none of this stuff addressed the important issues before us.

And do you know what other important thing they didn't do?

The one thing they're required by law to do--pass a fucking budget for 2007.

Nov. 20 (Bloomberg) -- Republican congressional leaders have put off their remaining budget work until next year, dumping almost a half-trillion dollars of spending bills on the incoming Democratic majority, a spokesman for Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid said.

Reid's office has been alerted by Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist that Republicans have decided to pass another stopgap spending measure when they return to Washington next month and leave the rest of the budget work needed to fund the government next year to the Democrats, said Jim Manley, a spokesman for Reid.

You know what else they didn't do?

Actually go to work:

March 21, 2006 — The seats of Congress are empty this week, with the nation's lawmakers out of town for the St. Patrick's Day recess.

The empty seats are a sight that is becoming more common in the Capitol with Congress on track to set a modern-day record for the least amount of time in session. The House plans to be in Washington 97 days this year...

The average American has worked more than 50 days in 2006, but, so far, the House has worked in Washington just 19 days, a total of 118 hours. The Senate is not far behind with 33 days at the Capitol.

"If we get much shorter, I mean, we're going to have a drive-through Congress," said Mary Boyle of Common Cause.

The House calendar is already set for the rest of the year. The representatives will meet for two weeks in April, a week in May and July, and all of August. Even a national newspaper points out that with fewer than 100 days scheduled, the House is on track to be in session less than what President Harry Truman called the "do-nothing" Congress of 1948.

Didn't go to work.  Didn't do what you paid them to do.  And then, at the last minute of their terms, right before an election, at a time that they've been describing to you as World War Four, they spent an entire summer proposing bills on flag burning, gay marriage, taxing hookers, a national language, Congressional pay raises, and the Pledge of Allegiance.

And--ooops!--they forgot to propose a budget for 2007!  Sorry!

But, at least they were sincere, unlike those silly partisan Democrats, who are doing nothing but engage in political theatre!

The president also accused Democrats of partisanship in the House vote on Friday for a war spending bill that requires combat operations to cease before September 2008…

“By choosing to make a political statement and passing a bill they know will never become law, the Democrats in Congress have only delayed the delivery of the vital funds and resources our troops need,” Bush said…

It's a terrible thing to see politicians so craven that they would pass a bill they know will never become law for base political purposes.

WASHINGTON (CNN) -- The Senate is scheduled to vote Wednesday morning on a controversial constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriage, but even supporters concede the measure does not have enough votes to win approval.

And:

Observers give the flag amendment a better chance of passing than the one to ban same-sex marriages that was defeated earlier this month.

Which is almost certainly true when you consider that even supporters of the same sex marriage amendment conceded that it had no chance of passing.

Bush said that to get the votes needed to pass the bill, House Democrats included billions of dollars in domestic and pork barrel spending for local congressional districts, including $74 million for peanut storage and $25 million for spinach growers, that has nothing to do with the war.

Good Lord!  What kind of douchebag would tie desperately needed funds for The Troops in the field with unrelated spending???  Wouldn't you have to be the biggest asshole on God's green Earth to make spending on The Troops conditional for some other appropriation???

(CBS/AP) The Bush administration threatened for the first time Tuesday to veto an $87 billion package for Iraq and Afghanistan if Congress converts any Iraqi rebuilding money into loans.

White House officials issued the warning even though many lawmakers agree that the bill's final version is likely to bow to President Bush and omit any loans. By underscoring Mr. Bush's opposition to loans, the administration threat could make it easier for congressional Republican leaders to nail down enough votes to help the president prevail.

The House bill included $18.6 to help Iraq rebuild its water supplies, health clinics and Army, and made the money a grant that country would not have to repay.

D'oh!

Yeah, that's right.  To get the appropriation for nearly twenty billion dollars of your money for Iraqis, George Bush tied it to money for your troops.  Then he ran an entire campaign attacking John Kerry for voting against funding The Troops because John Kerry voted against the 20 billion dollar taxpayer give away--that, by the way, vanished--that George Bush tied, for no reason at all(har!) to funding The Troops.

And, now, George Bush is saying that tying any conditions to funding The Troops is partisan and mere politics.

And George is threatening to again veto--for all you right wing nuts that's a vote against supporting The Troops!--an appropriation for The Troops.

And, let's not forget, the only reason George W. Bush is still in the White House is that a razor thin margin of people inexplicably seemed to believe for about one day in 2004 that George Bush was the best candidate to get bin Laden, win the war in Iraq, and protect us all from Terrorism.

Those were the important issues before him.  And, nearly six years later, bin Laden is still free.  Iraq grinds on.  And protecting us from terrorism?

WASHINGTON - A Homeland Security database of national monuments, chemical plants and other structures vulnerable to terror attacks is too faulty to accurately help divide federal funds to states and cities, according to the department’s internal watchdog.

Much of the study by Homeland Security Inspector General Richard Skinner appears to have been completed before the department announced in May it would cut security grants to New York and Washington by 40 percent this year...

Instead, the department’s database of vulnerable critical infrastructure and key resources included the Old MacDonald's Petting Zoo near Huntsville, Ala., a bourbon festival, a bean festival and the Kangaroo Conservation Center in Dawsonville, Ga.

There is no irrational anger towards George Bush.  No one who is angry at George Bush is unhinged.

The guy's an asshole.

It's not even politics anymore. 

He's just a total dick.
 

Confused And Divided

The e-mail exchange -- part of about 3,000 pages of internal documents turned over to Congress this week -- show a confused and divided Justice Department under siege in a political crisis largely of its own making.

What is that?  A clean sweep?

The CIA, FEMA, the NSA, Treasury, Department of Homeland Security, Defense, the State Department, and now Justice...all confused, divided, and largely disfunctional.

In just six short years.

It's no wonder conservatives hate government so much.  They just can't seem to make the fucking thing work!

It Was Performance Related!

One of the remarkable aspects of the U.S. attorney firings is that the Justice Department didn't select a group of mediocre prosecutors and then try to smear them as underperforming -- oh, no. They chose from among the most distinguished U.S. attorneys in the country (by the DoJ's own admission), and then announced to the world that they'd canned them for "performance related" issues…

"Six of the eight U.S. attorneys fired by the Justice Department ranked in the top third among their peers for the number of prosecutions filed last year, according to an analysis of federal records."

Apparently, the fired United States Attorneys failed to live up to the high standards of professional incompetence demanded by the Bush administration.

Simple Rules For Simple Minds

"We fight the terrorists and we fight all of those who give them aid.  America has a message for the nations of the world:  If you harbor terrorists, you are terrorists.  (Applause.)  If you train or arm a terrorist, you are a terrorist.  (Applause.)  If you feed a terrorist or fund a terrorist, you're a terrorist, and you will be held accountable by the United States and our friends.  (Applause.)"

George W. Bush, November 21, 2001, giving thirty eight percent of Americans a War Boner.

"Mixed signals are the wrong signals...I will continue to lead with clarity, and when I say something, I'll mean what I say.''

George W. Bush, September of 2004.

BOGOTA, Colombia (CNN) -- Colombian President Alvaro Uribe said Saturday he favored the extradition to his country of executives of U.S. banana producer Chiquita after the company's admission that it paid Colombian right-wing death squads more than $1.7 million…

Details and amounts of money Chiquita paid to the guerrillas were not disclosed. But the Justice Department said Chiquita made at least 100 direct and indirect payments totaling at least $1.7 million to the AUC between 1997 and 2004.

Colombian authorities outlawed right-wing paramilitary forces in 1989. The U.S. State Department added the AUC to its list of foreign terrorist groups in September 2001.

In November 2001, Israeli arms dealers illegally shipped 3,000 AK-47 assault rifles and 2.5 million rounds of ammunition into Colombia for the AUC through a port facility operated by Chiquita subsidiary Banadex.

D'oh!

What are you going to do now, George?  Are you going to turn over the Board of Directors of Chiquita to Columbian authorities?  Are you going to freeze the assets of Israel?  Or, are you going to direct the State Department to add the name of the great United States to its list of nations that harbor and support terrorists?

This is the problem we, as Americans, all have when we have a stupid person in White House saying idiotic things that he doesn't mean.

This is what got the "left" so "unhinged" about this stupid, stupid person.  It isn't Bush Derangement Syndrome.  It's the fact that everytime this jackass opens his mouth, he forces The People to make the Hard Choice between merely looking like we're full of shit or acting like our collective heads are full of shit.

Nearly seventy percent of Americans get it now.  The deranged "left" are just the ones who got it at the time.

Ignorance Is Not A Defense

WASHINGTON (CNN) -- Attorney General Alberto Gonzales said Tuesday "mistakes were made" regarding the firing of eight U.S. attorneys and he accepts responsibility for the ordeal.

"My pledge to the American people is to find out what went wrong here," he said at a Tuesday afternoon news conference. "As we can all imagine, in an organization of 110,000 people, I am not aware of every bit of information that passes through the halls of justice, nor am I aware of all decisions."

The very Cornerstone to the Foundation of The Party Of Personal Responsibility--the "I was not aware" defense!  We can trace it back to the Sainted Ronald Reagan, the Godfather of the modern Gee Oh Pee, who wasn't aware that he was running a covert and illegal war out of the office of his Vice President, Bush the Smarter, who, himself, was "out of the loop" and, therefore, not aware, either.

Republicans have sworn by it ever since. 

Condi wasn't "aware" that terrorists might use airplanes as missiles, even though American intelligence had prepared a memo specifically warning that terrorists might use airplanes as missiles against any number of targets, including the Pentagon.  Even though, in July of 2001, real missiles were used in Genoa to protect the President against "aerial incursion during the [G8] summit".

Neither Bush, Condi, or Ashcroft were "aware" that bin Laden planned to attack the United States, despite a PDB titled "bin Laden Determined To Attack Inside The United States".

Colin Powell was not "aware" that his presentation to the United Nations detailing Saddam's awesome stockpile of Weapons of Mass Destruction was total bullshit despite his becoming "so angry at the lack of adequate sourcing to intelligence claims that he declared: 'I'm not reading this. This is bullshit'."

Neither Bush, Condi, nor the entire White House staff was "aware" that the claims regarding enriched uranium the President made to the American people in his State of the Union Address were, in the uncivil potty mouth words of Colin Powell, "bullshit" despite the fact that the CIA had already told all of them just that.

Neither Bush nor Condi were "aware" that their claims alleging the aluminum tubes Iraq had purchased were for nuclear weapons were highly questionable despite the fact that the IAEA, and U.S. and British intelligence had all told Bush and Condi that they had questions about these tubes.

And on and on.

Bush wasn't "aware" that he hadn't properly disclosed his sale of Harken stock.  And he wasn't aware that he wasn't supposed to sell his Harken stock, despite Harken lawyers writing him a letter, saying, "Whatever you do--DO NOT SELL YOUR HARKEN STOCK".  And he wasn't aware that he even had insider knowledge about Harken despite the fact that he was a member of Harken's audit committee.

No one was "aware" that Iraq might not have a single WMD.  No was "aware" that occupying Iraq might take more than 135,000 troops.  No one was "aware" that invading Iraq might cost a trillion dollars.  No one was "aware" that we didn't even have a plan to reconstruct Iraq on the eve of our invasion of Iraq.

Neither Rove, nor Cheney, nor Armitage, nor Scooter Libby were "aware" that Valery Plame was a covert operative for the CIA.  And neither Bush nor McClellan were "aware" that Rove, and Cheney, and Armitage, and Scooter Libby were running around telling every journalist in Washington that Plame was an operative for the CIA.

And on and on.

And all that "personal responsibility" for not being "aware" of things that the Party Of Personal Responsibility was personally responsible for has resulted in three medals of Freedom, a couple of promotions, some "retirements"--with benefits!--and one indictment, which everyone in Washington agrees is totally bogus!

So, anyway, it's a smart move by Gonzales to go with the old Republican chestnut of "I was not aware".

I mean, as he says, he's got 112 thousand people working for him.  How's he supposed to know what goes on with each and every single one of them?

Course, out of those 112 thousand people, only 93 of them are United States Attorneys.  And, aside from Gonzales, those 93 are the highest ranking officials in the Justice Department.  And, all 93 of them are personally appointed by the President, himself.

So, it kind of makes you think that, when nearly one out every ten of the highest ranking people, personally appointed by the President, himself, get fired at the same time, the Attorney General might be aware of that.

Or he might make himself aware of that.

And, if not, he's a fucking oblivious idiot who shouldn't get paid because he's obviously not showing up at the office Monday through Thursday.  And he's leaving early on Friday.

And, oh yeah:

Meanwhile, the chief of staff to Gonzales has resigned, the Justice Department said Tuesday, as criticism grows over the firings.

Gonzales was not "aware" that his Chief of Staff--his own personal assistant, whose job entirely consists of carrying out the wishes of the Attorney General--was firing these U.S. Attorneys for political purposes.

Exceptional circumstances of private, personal corruption aside, if you're the Attorney General or the Vice President, or the President, or the White House pastry chef and you are not aware of what your Chief of Staff is doing, you are too stupid and lazy and incompetent to work for The People of the United States.

You're not doing your job.

And taking "responsibility" means--at the least--resigning.  In any other profession, you'd be fired.  In more than a few, you'd be arrested.

I don't even care.  Who cares?  Who are these crazy people who care?

All of this proves nothing.

Because it was all self evident long ago.

These people, these Bush people--all of them--are either too stupid, too dishonest, too incompetent, or--as bullshitting, foul mouthed, vituperative Colin Powell would say--too full of bullshit to ever be entrusted to run the great government of our glorious republic. 

They disrespect and corrupt, and dishonor every proud institution that is our collective birth-right, that belongs to us, that serves us, that protects us, and that represents us.

And they do it on purpose.

They mean to.

It's in their emails.  Buried in their document dumps.

They dishonor your greatest institutions and proudest traditions to ratfuck people who cross them.

That's the high esteem they hold for The People of the great United States and the noble government which those people formed and fought and died for.

Or maybe they weren't "aware" that was important to you.

America Needs Mayans

GUATEMALA CITY, Guatemala (CNN) -- Mayan Indian leaders have vowed to "spiritually cleanse" an ancient site in Guatemala after U.S. President George W. Bush visits during his seven-day, five-nation tour of Latin America…

Mayan priests say they will purify the sacred archaeological site to rid it of any "bad spirits" after Bush is there.

And Yet Dennis Miller Is Still Doing His Crap-Ass Act

WEST HOLLYWOOD, California (AP) -- Richard Jeni, a standup comedian who played to sold-out crowds, was a regular on the "Tonight Show" and appeared in movies, died of a gunshot wound in an apparent suicide, police said Sunday.

It's been a long time since I've seen it, but I remember "Platypus Man" to be about the funniest thing, after "No Cure For Cancer", I've seen a comedian do.

R.I.P., Richard.  Thanks for the laughs.

The Great Diplomat Gets The Usual Welcome

SAO PAULO, Brazil (AP) -- President Bush opened a weeklong tour of Latin America on Thursday as police clashed with protesters in Brazil and across the region…

The president and his advisers also hoped his visit would offset the growing influence of leftist leaders, such as Venezuela's Hugo Chavez.

Yes, that's a good idea.  Let's send the least competent and popular guy on the planet to South America to counter the growing influence of Chavez!  Remember, this is the administration that sent the United States military to Iraq to counter the growing influence of Iran and Syria.

BAGHDAD, Iraq (CNN) -- Far from the daily warfare in the streets of the Iraqi capital, another, quieter struggle is being waged -- that for control of Iraq's intelligence agencies.

It's a battle with high stakes for the United States. The Iraqi National Intelligence Service, or INIS, is funded completely by the U.S. Central Intelligence Agency, according to military and intelligence sources…

But now, the future of the U.S.-controlled agency appears to be in jeopardy. A document from Iraq's National Security Council lays out a blueprint for Iraq's new intelligence community. Under that plan, all intelligence gathering would be consolidated under Iraq's Iranian-friendly central government.

D'oh!

Hmmm.  Okay.  The Europeans hate him.  Putin mocks him in public.  The Africans can't stand him.  The North Koreans are grateful for the opportunity he gave them to build a couple of nuclear weapons before making him flip flop.  He's totally fucked up the Middle East.  Americans don't like him.   And even the notoriously nice Canadians give him the finger.

And he's the least popular American president among latin Americans ever.

Sure, he's despised in six continents, and sending him abroad to create goodwill...well, it's crazy.  It's so crazy...it just might work!

But then, "it's so crazy...it just might work" actually is our official foreign policy.  Ever since that whole creating our own reality thing turned out to totally suck.

So, how's that working out?  That whole crazy countering Chavez thing?

Oh.

Well, maybe they really like Hitler in Sao Paulo!  You know, the Boys From Brazil and all that.

And, if not, there's always Antarctica.

White House spokesman Gordon Johndroe said Bush "enjoys traveling to thriving democracies where freedom of speech and expression are the law of the land." Bush himself played down expected protests in interviews with Latin American news organizations ahead of his trip.

"I am proud to be going to a part of the world where people can demonstrate, where people can express their minds," he said in an interview with Univision.

Oh, God.  Do we really have to endure the national humiliation of having the first retarded President fly to South America to personally deliver the export of domestic Stupid?  What's he afraid of?  That the South Americans will stop supplying rum for his "brush" clearing expeditions?

[Bush] told CNN En Espanol: "The trip is to remind people that we care..."

Bush did not plan visits to any countries that have moved into Chavez's sphere of influence, including Argentina, Bolivia, Ecuador and Nicaragua.

Ah!  The old "isolation" tactic! Sweet! 

That's worked so well for the Bush administration.  You know, with countries like North Korea and Iran, and Syria.  Maybe Bush can put Bolton in charge of his positive message of caring to South America and then even little dirt poor Bolivia can have a nuclear weapon too!

Though, it's going to be a little tough to counter Chavez's influence if you don't actually engage the people in countries where Chavez has influence.

Why am I complaining?  Send Bush around the globe.  Don't let him stop.  Send him everywhere.  We've got far too much domestic Stupid on our hands.  We really need to get it out of the country.