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« I've Waited One Whole Year... | Main | The Festivus Gets The Best Of Us »

January 02, 2006

Comments

AvengingAngel

Check out:
"Bush's 12-Step Program"

Elkit

Julia's posse to the rescue! Say, can we send your husband to the White House, to remove the non-native invasives there?
That'll be my new battle cry: Xeriscape the White House!

Elayne Riggs

Thanks Ricky, those are all good responses! That's pretty much what I tried to say to my husband but I'm not as eloquent as you. :)

vetiver

Jeez, julia, that hadn't even occurred to me! I grew up about 90 miles southeast of Crawford, and I can't even count the times I got so sunburned I blistered. The sun is so fierce it'll burn you through a t-shirt, much less some feeble sunscreen. And even as a smallish girl helping string fence or clear brush (which doesn't offer any shade at all), I never scraped up my face.

Now I'm wishing I could've heard the conversation when they decided what the cover story would be. Stringing fence? Cutting calves? Building a shed? Working on the patio?


paul

my favorite was from a few years ago. bush shows up with a scrape on his face. it was explained away as bush falling off his bike on a wet trail after a storm. someone did some research on the weather. it hadn't rained in about 8 days.

ricky

That would be this post:

President Bush took a spill during a Saturday afternoon bike ride on his ranch, suffering bruises and cuts that were visible later on his face just two days before he was to deliver a major prime-time speech on his Iraq policy.

The president was nearing the end of a 17-mile ride on his mountain bike, accompanied by a Secret Service agent, a military aide and his personal physician, Richard Tubb, who treated him at the scene, said White House spokesman Trent Duffy.

"It's been raining a lot and the topsoil is loose," Duffy said. "You know this president. He likes to go all-out. Suffice it to say he wasn't whistling show tunes."

Which reveals no rain for 8 days when the Preznit fell on his face because "[i]t's been raining a lot".

It's funny because it's not only total bullshit, but because of Duffy's bizarre "as you all know, this Preznit ain't no sissy fag" comment.

Duffy offered that up, even though no reporter had suggested that the Preznit was a big ol' sissy boy, out peddling around on a pink tricycle with "It's Raining Men" blaring on his IPod.

I don't want to do any more amateur psychology, but I will anyway. Actually, I'm lying. I do want to. Here it is:

When someone denies something they haven't even been accused of, they're probably guilty of it.

Though, I doubt it was show tunes. Maybe "Hey, There, Georgie Girl"...

joe earl

Look, Bush gets slapped around by his handlers every weekend for the mistakes he made last week. There's no "brush", there are no "accidents". Just a couple of guys from the GHW Bush Secret Police or the Cheney Super Squad going, "Dammit George!" *slap* "I told you not to go off script again!" *smack* "Do it right next time or it'll be more brush clearing next week!" *thwack*

Kip W

Another tragic run-in with a bottle brush. Those can hurt.

someone

ooh, another one! Remember the "cyst" on his cheek that required a HUGE bandage?

Alamaine

I think it's "Brooks (mit 's', no 'e')" Army Medical Center.

Anyway, 's' or 'e', it's hard to get all them lettres straight when under the influence of a contact high, eh? What? (Hic)

Georgie might be one of those distinguished drunks, someone whose personal appeal becomes greater when he's had a few. There are those -- Foster Brooks among them -- who actually grow in stature when they've imbibed (or acted like it). I can recall a fellow in my younger years who, after three or so vodka over ices, would become increasing philosophical and actually quite intelligent to listen to. His claim to fame was his booze gut that he was proud of as one of his finest investments. He was a good family man and a nice, all around fellow. There were times when he had a bone to pick and would become increasingly philosophical and command the respect of all of those around him. He also found his way into some brush once after a bout at the bars and while walking downhill from the garage, he just kinda picked up momentum and wound up in a bunch of blackberry bushes after he veered off of the road, walking. That was good for a few laughs!

As pointed out about the Ivy League professor, alcohol can be a calmative and restorative for some. It can increase perspective, once the proper body chemistry is brought back into balance. A lot depends on habit, how one has compensated for lackings and failings in the past. This is not an endorsement of either the fellow or his condition. I'm merely pointing out that the psychology is a little more involved than random snippitiness, not being able to know any more than the news tells us. As far as I've read, Georgie was always a jovial drunk and perhaps a better man for himself for it, looking from the outside in. For everyone else, his caretakers and enablers? Probably not. But a good drunk always has good people to look after him or her.

nomativa

As a former outrageous drunk myself, I know what drunks look like and act like. The Prez is not a reformed drunk. He is still drinking. But maybe he has to just to face the world. Everything is so complicated out there, and he has been in over his head since about 7th grade. He couldn't run a hot-dog stand by himself.

Alex

Hell, I used to work on ranches in northern Australia, and you know? I used to finish the working day covered in bites, stings, sawtooth nicks, bruises, sprains, kicks from cattle/horses, thorns, spinifex cuts, sore arse from riding in a pool of sweat, sunburned down to a top-five percentile skin cancer risk, blisters on my feet, blisters on my hands...

but never, fuckit, did I find any way of damaging my face other than riding a motorcycle full pelt through a wire fence. (I do remember a mate who got half his face laid wide open by a fence wire that snapped under tension, and needed a dozen stitches, but that was a statistical outlier.)

Mind you, I did once manage to get in a fight in which someone raked a key across my forehead, leaving a distinctive comb-like pattern of scratches. Guess what? I was incredibly, stupidly, brutally drunk.

alan aronson

I've been doing landscaping and construction for decades and have the scars to prove it. I occasionaly bang my head above my hair line (('m tall) but, come to think of it, I've only had but one or two scrapes on my face in over 40 years..

Pants Elk

I love you all very much.
But the laughter begins to choke you after a while.
We have a nasty, twisted, murderous, lying gay alcoholic crook as a president.
Yok it up?

Juno888

I'll also say this: real people do cut and clear "brush" in states all over the country. Not just Texas. In Pennsylvania, in Iowa, in Oklahoma.

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