I know I'm late on this one, but I don't know what to say.
I mean, it's Akron. Penn State is supposed to beat Akron.
Don't get me wrong--I was joyous and without complaint from 3:30 Saturday until...well, I was just full of joy. For a long time. I haven't even refueled, and I think I've still got a little joy in the tank.
For those of you who don't have the good sense to live and die, every Saturday of every fall of your lives with every play of the noble Nittany Lions, let me just say:
Roar like a Lion, fools, or be gobbled up like prey!
And my noble Nittany Lions did a little roaring.
I was especially pleased to see Anthony Morelli open up on the first play, of his first start, and unload like a fifty fucking yard bomb on the money in the end zone. Good for you, Anthony. And good for you for those frozen ropes you were throwing on those outs. And for most of the really good and quick and right decisions you were making all day long. In the rain.
Not to be the eternal bitch, but I have to say(I really do): it does suck to see a guy come out and throw the ball around in a way a Penn State QB hasn't since Collins all the while knowing that kid burned a year of eligibility his freshman year to throw like two passes in mop up time. And that he burned a second year of eligibility to throw like four passes his sophomore season.
His third year of eligibility and, on Saturday, he threw his first starting pass of his career.
Into the end zone.
Penn State's recievers are the best in the country. I'm not kidding you. They're fast. They're so fast, if you watch the games on TV, you have no idea how fast they are. Other teams, they watch PSU on film, and they don't get it.
Like Ohio State, last year. Their corners and safeties spent an entire week talking about how they matched up, and how PSU recievers hadn't seen a secondary like OSU, and how they were going to shut down PSU's recievers and hit them hard and blah, blah, blah.
About half way through the first quarter of that game, Ohio State's corners were playing about ten yards off PSU's recievers, and OSU's safeties, for those PSU fans with high powered binoculars, appeared to be about three feet tall.
They weren't that small. They were just so goddammed far away from the line of scrimmage that they appeared to be tiny.
OSU's entire secondary was also running a half step slower after that first quarter from what appeared to be a rather large load in their diapers after being beaten long on three or four plays.
But, and here's my bitch, Robinson missed his receivers every single time. Penn State won that game. But they could have been up 21-0 in the first quarter. Instead, it went down to the last 30 seconds.
And I'm not blaming Robinson. With another year or two at QB, he might have hit everyone he threw at. Maybe not. But who knows?
Another year or two at QB, and he might have got the ball into the end zone before the second half against Michigan. Maybe not. But who knows?
We'll never know, because Robinson and Morelli were sitting on the sidelines while PSU won seven games in two years. I might be crazy, but those kinds of years seem, to me, to be the perfect times to get your future QBs some game experience.
Joe was a great coach. He's a great recruiter. Maybe the best. He's got a little bit left. In the last two years, since he got frightened that he might actually be fired and started to recruit again, he has brought in talent that I don't think Penn State has ever had.
But, Joe, do it or retire. Wrap it up. It's time. You're eighty. You haven't been thinking too clearly for the last three or four years--the kick off to Breaston? Shut up!--and it's horrifying to see you on the sidelines in the rain or late in the fourth quarter of a close game.
I mean, how traumatic is that going to be if Joe Paterno dies during ESPN's Gameday???
Okay. End of the bitch.
Morelli looked great. Rocket arm. Mostly good choices. He's going to make a lot of dumb mistakes, unfortunately, because he's never played.
Receivers are fantastic. They're fast, really fast, and they catch almost everything.
Linebackers? Shut up! They've got six of the best linebackers in the country.
But it is what it is. Their offensive line looked lousy. Their defensive line didn't look much better.
Their safeties are going to be great. Their corners will be fine.
But if their O and D lines don't get a whole lot better in a great big hurry?
Donna is talking about this dipshit Bomar and, no, I can not believe him. And I know, I know--we're all supposed to feel some compassion and some sympathy and some empathy for these poor college athletes who slave under the tyrany of the NCAA, getting nothing in return except for an entirely free college eduction worth over a hundred thousand dollars at the best universities in the country, free room and board at those same universities, insanely obscene wild girl frenzies every night of the week with hormone crazed co-eds between the ages of 18 and 22, and the once in a lifetime opportunity to step out onto a football field in front of one hundred thousand screaming fans. On network TV.
It could be worse. Your dumbass quarterback could be named Jim Bob Cooter!
Though, if he was, he'd have to room with his nose guard, Booger Pickens.
Thompson was better anyway. I think the Sooners are going to kick ass this year!
Spoken like a true Democrat, Donna. Full of optimism and hope, and like the rest of us Democrats, frankly, I think you're going to be brutally abused by some idiot out of Texas. Though, I could be wrong. Last year, for instance, I thought Penn State was going to be horrible.
With Connor, Shaw, and Pozluskny...Pozsceleski? Pozpepsi? Possumupatree?
Whatever. They've got the best linebackers in the country. And, if they took those three guys off the field, they've got three more linebackers behind them who could start for any school in the country.
And they've got two or three lightning fast wideouts. They've got a QB with a rocket arm. They've got a couple of backs who are good for a 1000 yards.
And they've got four guys on the O-line and three guys on the D-line who have never started.
And, oh yeah, their coach is a thousand years old.