He was nowhere to be found on stage, but Rudy Giuliani's campaign shrewdly rushed to declare victory after Tuesday night's Democratic debate in Philadelphia - chiefly because the former New York mayor emerged as the preferred whipping boy among the seven Democratic rivals.
Giuliani's name came up a few times, most notably when Sen. Joseph Biden called Giuliani the "most under-qualified man since George Bush to seek the presidency...I mean, think about it. Rudy Giuliani. There's...there's only three things he mentions in a sentence: a noun, a verb and 9/11."
Those lines played to laughs, and a member of Giuliani's team fired back quickly Tuesday night, noting that Giuliani, unlike Biden, "rarely reads prepared speeches, and when he does he isn't prone to ripping off the text from others," a reference to stump speeches Biden gave in 1987 that lifted heavily from campaign talks by the British Labor Party leader at the time.
But Biden's remarks were significant less for their humor than what they dramatized: Giuliani has become the Republican the Democrats seem to worry most about of late.
Joe Biden pantsed Rudy on national television. First, Biden gave Rudy a melvin. Then, he pantsed him, then he spanked him, then he lifted him up by his ankles and dipped him in the Boy's room toilet for a good ol' fashioned swirly.
And, for the rest of the day, everyone laughed and pointed as Rudy walked around with a wet head, a sore ass, and the elastics of his underpants up around his armpits.
You don't believe me? Watch:
Christ Almighty! If a Republican laid that line on a Democrat? It would be over. Every freaking gibbering monkey on every single network and cable new show would be breaking their necks bobbing in agreement about how that was The Quip of This Election.
Every dipshit pundit would be falling all over themselves to pronounce that quip "Endgame!" "Devestating!" "Hilarious!"
Twenty seven years ago, Sainted Ronny Rotten badly recited his lameass and overly rehearsed, "There you go again" and your librul media still can't stop talking about what genius that was!
And, here, Biden says something that's not only actually funny, but it's true, and what does your librul media have to say about that?
People, there is no librul media.
There are a few very, very wealthy and powerful men and women, who own 90% of the equity in this country, and they send 90% of your representatives to Washington, and they live and operate outside the laws of the rabble you and I call The People.
And, oh, by the way, they own all your television stations, and they own all your radio stations, and they own all your magazines and newspapers.
And they aim to keep it that way. Forever and ever and ever.