They're certainly making a joke out of your government.
WASHINGTON - The House, citing the nation's religious origins, voted Wednesday to protect the Pledge of Allegiance from federal judges who might try to stop schoolchildren and others from reciting it because of the phrase "under God."
Because, you know, everytime some little agnostic brat says the Pledge without mentioning God, like a thousand dollars goes flying out of my wallet.
Oh, yeah, also pimps and hos.
With such important measures which have about zero chance of passing on their agenda, it's no wonder Republicans in Congress don't have any time to spend on, you know, actually doing their jobs. Like overseeing the unparalleled waste of tax payers dollars:
In all, the Livestock Compensation Program cost taxpayers $1.2 billion during its two years of existence, 2002 and 2003. Of that, $635 million went to ranchers and dairy farmers in areas where there was moderate drought or none at all, according to an analysis of government records by The Washington Post. None of the ranchers were required to prove they suffered an actual loss. The government simply sent each of them a check based on the number of cattle they owned…
In one county in northern Texas, ranchers collected nearly $1 million for an ice storm that took place a year and a half before the livestock program was even created. In Washington state, ranchers in one county received $1.6 million for an earthquake that caused them no damage. In Wisconsin, a winter snowstorm triggered millions of dollars more. For hundreds of ranchers from East Texas to the Louisiana border, the shuttle explosion opened the door to about $5 million, records show…
"The livestock program was a joke. We had no losses," de Boer said. "I don't know what Congress is thinking sometimes."
Well, silly, they're thinking about little kids not saying "under God" in homeroom, something which has been costing taxpayers billions of dollars! Congress doesn't have time to oversee Congressional programs! You know what else Congress doesn't have time to oversee? Executive programs!
Among the many superlatives associated with Hurricane Katrina can now be added this one: it produced one of the most extraordinary displays of scams, schemes and stupefying bureaucratic bungles in modern history, costing taxpayers up to $2 billion.
You know what else Congress doesn't have time to oversee? Wars in which America is actually involved!
WASHINGTON (CNN) -- Nearly $9 billion of money spent on Iraqi reconstruction is unaccounted for because of inefficiencies and bad management, according to a watchdog report published Sunday.
Republicans in Congress also don't have time to oversee no bid contracts, whether members of various appropriation committees are doling out billions of dollars of public money in exchange for hookers and boats, or whether foreign nationals are being beaten to death in American custody. They don't have time to oversee or investigate government programs involving wire tapping average citizens or monitoring their financial transactions. Congress isn't the least bit concerned the lack of WMDs in Iraq, the awful, deteriorating state of Iraq, or about apparent total disinterest of the executive branch in catching or killing bin Laden.
Hell, this Republican Congress didn't even have time to hold hearings on September 11th!
And they certainly don't have time to even consider legislation about average Americans. Though, they did take time out from their important Jesus debates to pass a quick and quiet vote in favor of something I'm sure every American supports--pay raises for Congress!
WASHINGTON - Despite record low approval ratings, House lawmakers Tuesday embraced a $3,300 pay raise that will increase their salaries to $168,500.
You know what? I'm all for it. Keep God in the Pledge. Erect a giant white cross on the Capitol dome. Introduce the Preznit as "His Holiness". And close every vote in Congress with a hearty yet humble "Amen".
With Republicans running the gubment, only God can help us.