Better Than Jaw Opening Dwarf p0rn!

Yeah, dwarf p0rn is hot.  But where's the money in it?

Subject: How many times girls dumped you because of your small dick?
Date: Wednesday, December 28, 2005 2:57 AM
From: liz.decker <obugiqwocau@hotmail.com>
To: ricky

E@rn miI1i0ns w1th your new $uper-sized dick by Penis Enlarge Patch.
Get enormous, big and thick, pretty, long, amazing dick.
And Penis Enlarge Patch can do all this for you.

I can e@rn mil1i0ns w1th my new $uper-sized dick!

I'm intrigued and, yet, skeptical.  I mean, it doesn't really say how I'm going to make mil1i0ns w1th my new $uper-sized dick.

Is it modeling?  Magazines?  The internets?  Is it $uper-size dick offs at county fairs? 

I'm all in for the $uper-sized dick and everything.  Don't get me wrong.  I'm not ungrateful.  I just want to know how to parlay it into the mil1ions of dollars.

Some email almost makes me not totally hate my worthless SPAM filter.  It's that good.

Comments

[Mary Florida]

And the super sized dick will be pretty too. You can dress it up in little outfits and put on shows at half-time. That oughta be worth a couple of bucks.

[trueleigh]

I bet the spam filter was cornfused - it's only natural to mistake "super-size dick" for "Dick" Cheney.

[ricky]

I like the fact that it's a patch. So while you're wearing it, people will say, "Hey, you're wearing a patch. What are you, giving up smoking?"

And you can say, "Nope. $uper-sizing my dick!"

[Elkit]

If it is $uper-size dick offs at county fairs, please post the schedule here. Thank you ever so much.

[Ellen]

You can take it to McDonalds. Actually, maybe ther're running the spam. Supersize me.

Frankly Ricky, your best best is the stretching thing you wrote about awhile ago. Actually, with THAT AND the patch you can run your own male enhancement business and make millions. Or, just design a thong Speedo with "super-sized" gel support - do you have that line? (You know, sometimes what you don't see...)

By the way, I saw a lot of Speedos in Key West and wondered if they were Ricky Speedos or cheap knock-offs.

[Ibadairon]

On a serious note (not that $uper-$izing it ain't!), if you're really getting a lot of the crap and you can forward mail from your real account to another destination, give spamcop.net a look. Your mail automatically gets sent to their server and filtered and then you just POP it off their server (like I assume you're doing with your mail account now). It's about $30 a year and well worth it. (No, I don't own stock or anything!)

Of course, no solution is 100%, so I usually use their web interface to check what's in my Inbox and zap anything that got through before downloading. And if I can't be bothered to do that, I have a program on my computer called SpamSieve that pretty much eats everything else. It's Macware, but there may be a Windows version now. FWIW.

[Neil Shakespeare]

What you need is the new 'SpamDick Blocker' program. It works much like a chastity belt, only in reverse. Besides, you know, those penis enlargement ads are only for those poor unfortunate souls who NEED those things.

[Jerry]

Is it a soul patch? Or is that just gratuitous stereotyping?

And don't let 'em fool ya, ricky! My enormous yet pretty member has yet to earn me any money...though once it did get me a little scratch...well, more like an itch,but close enough!