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April 22, 2005



"Jimmy Montezuma" here. Not too bad.


Jimmy Montezuma???

Damn. That's a good porn name!


Good thing it wasn't "second pet." Then I would have been "Creampuff Montezuma," and would have had to star in a whole different genre of porn!


Ricky, you are definitely more of an American Bigshot than a Bismark.

American Bigshot Sylvania. or Abs. The washboard-ish six-pack-ish kind I'm sure.


Oh, man. This quiz. I lived on streets like "71st Court" and "84th Avenue" - hardly the stuff of porn names - so I substitute the town of my birth. The first pet I owned was "Stinky" - but I didn't name him. The first pet I named was the unfortunate "Peaches Precious" (cuz I couldn't settle on calling her "Peaches" or "Precious" and I was a dork, even at age 5).

Oh... my... that makes me...
Peaches Precious Temple.


You can call me Stinky if you want.

(Jimmy Montezuma is hot!)


I really like Stinky Precious Peaches!

Not that's hot!


"Peaches Precious LXXI" is good! And very 'au courant' with the news!


Though the more I think about it, "Stinky the 71st" has a nice papal ring, too, if not a really pleasant porn appeal.


BD Bayberry?? BD was my brother's bird. Samantha Bayberry?? Sam was my first dog. Both sound pretty bad. I knew I should have named Sam, Honey or Candy. (And lived on a different street.)

Jimmy Montezuma is much better than Creampuff Montezuma, Jerry.


Get out the Kleenex:



Oh, what I wouldn't give to see Jimmy Montezuma and Muffy Monte Vista go at it like Rick Santorum and a dog in heat!


The naming thing actually came from a tv show Will and Grace and it gave the formula for Drag Queens to chose their name. Now that puts a different slant on it. Which name is the best Drag Queen name?


I don't think you can go wrong with Muffy - that's just great!

There are a lot of variations on this game. I think the drag queen name game uses pet's name/mother's maiden name. I'm not saying what my mom's maiden name was, but it is a part of the body and it is slang for a sex act - so figure it out. Heheh.


Well, it ain't "Jimmy Montana"! Jimmy loves the ladies! Well, just one lady now, and sorry, ricky, for that reason, you'll not get to see "Jimmy Montezuma and Muffy Monte Vista go at it...". You'll just have to wait for the hidden-camera video of "Rick Santorum and a dog in heat (going at it)!" Though I personally disbelieve it exists; most any dog could outrun Santorum with his pants down. Though there are old, blind, disabled dogs out there, and we know how the loves fuck the old, blind, and/or disabled.


Damn, getting old is a bitch! I forgot my own porn-star name. Please read "Jimmy Montezuma" above. Sheesh!


Janis, is it bootie? I've been beating my head... oh, or is it head???... against the wall trying to figure it out.

I gotta give Stinky Head the prize here.


So, let's say that Jimmy Montezuma gets a little miffed at Muffy Monte Vista and want's retribution in the sequel.

Can we call the sequel Jimmy Montezuma's Revenge?




Cookie, you guessed it! Dang, but you're clever!


But it's pronounced "boo tay"?


As in "John Bigboote: That's BigbooTAY!" Buckaroo Bonzai


Not Bootie or Bootay or any other variation of same! Use yer noggin the way Cookie did, silly.


Head. Stinky Head. That's the name. Boot-tay is also fun! But in this case, 'head' is the name we were lookin' fer. And Janis wins the prize.

I mean, Jimmy Montezuma is good. And so it Muffy Monte Vista. But if you've got Head in your name....

Maybe if we could mix Pam's Muffy with Janis's Head.... well lets just say we could have a blockbuster there. Or at the very least, a worthy partner for Jimmy Montezuma.

I mean, as long as there is ornamental headgear and speedos involved, I'd go see it.


"Maybe if we could mix Pam's Muffy with Janis's Head..."

Nothin' new there...just two lonely, horny girls doing what they can...until Jimmy Montezuma, the pizza delivery guy, knocks on their door! That is when the party really starts!!


Even better: our gals are enjoying a midnight skinny dip - and who should show up but Jimmy Montezuma, the pool boy. 'course he's just there to check the chlorine levels. ;-)

Cue the wa-wa pedal.

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